He Hears Your Cries

Our Women's Bible Study discussed how helpful it is to remind ourselves of what God has done in our lives to remember his faithfulness to us and his love for us.  I have found this to be so helpful in my walk with Christ.  In college my roommate and I had a poster on the back of our door that we wrote answers to prayer on throughout the year to remind us of His faithfulness during a crazy time in our lives (I was student teaching with a not so hot mentor teacher and she was in her first year teaching).  I began this blog with the same idea, to remember all that God has done in our life. 

Today I'm getting ready to walk out of the hospital after about 2 and a half days of sitting here holding my little boy.  Monday night Timothy felt hot so I checked his temperature and it was 100.6 under the arm so I knew it was probably higher than what it was reading.  I called our pediatrician's office and they said to bring him into the emergency room.  My prayer the entire drive was protection for Timothy, one because taking him to a hospital freaks me out but also because I knew that kids under 2 months shouldn't have fevers.  Dr. Valente was wonderful.  He was gentle and patient when explaining the tests that needed to be done and the reasons why.  He tried hard not to alarm me while being honest...although the thought of a spinal tap on my 7 week old was alarming.  Every possible test was done to rule anything else out before doing a spinal tap and then he called our normal pediatrician, Dr. Plotnick, and she reassured me that it had to be done.  As a side note, she was on vacation and I'm sure we woke her up or at least messed up her relaxing morning!  By far she's the best doctor I've met and is worth the 35-40 min drive to get to her!  We survived this ordeal and then it was time to sit and wait for the results, however, because Timothy was obviously not looking well we had to stay instead of go home and wait.

It turned out that there were some white blood cells in the spinal fluid so we ended up in the hospital until all the cultures came back 48 hours later.  While I can't say I love being in the hospital, I appreciated the excellent level of care we've received at Greater Baltimore Medical Center.  Every nurse we've had was kind and worked with our schedules, such as working to pair taking vitals with either giving antibiotics or nursing so we're not constantly waking him.  I don't know that I've ever heard "can I get you anything" more frequently than over the past two days (except for after giving birth at Special Beginnings Birth Center).  The nurses and doctors have taken the time to answer my questions and did not make me feel dumb for asking them. 

I also was looking at the hospital from the standpoint of being there with a diabetic (if Marian ever has to come) and I appreciated that the meals come with a list of the carbohydrates behind each menu item and on the menu the carbohydrate amounts are listed behind it.  Plenty of healthy options are available. 

I will say this hospital stay has also been far different from the one we had 10 months ago with Marian.  I pretty much spent the past two days holding my little baby.  Once the iv was in there were not more shots, no entertaining a 3 year old in limited space, no having an incredible amount of information shoved at you while you're still processing the fact that your daughter's life and your own will NEVER be the same.  Just peacefully sitting in a quiet room holding my baby boy.  I'm grateful for the peace only God could give.  This peace allowed me to be grateful instead of frantic; to enjoy instead of fret. 

God was faithful in hearing my prayer and those of our friends and family.  He protected Timothy, our little boy had wonderful care and viral meningitis was a much better diagnosis than bacterial meningitis.  He was comfortable because his Mommy was able to stay with him thanks to family and friends that chipped in to meet Mark and the girls needs while I was away.  If we had a poster in our house with reminders of God's answers to prayer this week we'd have many things to write.

¹⁸ Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you;
therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.
For the Lord is a God of justice.
Blessed are all who wait for him!

¹⁹ People of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. ²⁰ Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. ²¹ Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”

Isaiah 30:18-20  (NIV)

 

(Timothy has been out of the hospital a week already, but I wrote this while I was there it just took me a while to edit this post)

How the Journey with Type 1 Diabetes Began- Day1

I can't believe I missed the signs!  Of course I wasn't really looking at them for my 2.5 year old.  I figured the behavior issues, incredible amount of peeing and drinking water were part of the age and possibly a gluten intolerance.  It made sense since my family has a history of it, so I put Marian on a gluten free diet.  It sort of worked but she was drinking like crazy, once she even filled a cup out of the toilet.  Completely embarrassing mom moment, didn't I teach her anything?  But also a very sad moment looking back at how desperately thirsty she must have been.  Finally I took her to the pediatrician.  She agreed that the signs I saw sounded like gluten and dairy problems.  She also asked to test her urine just before we left the office.  When she came back and said she found ketones, I knew that wasn't good.  I have been pregnant and have friends who have experienced gestational diabetes I knew what ketones meant: diabetes.  Three nurses proceeded to try and attempt to test Marian's blood sugar.  Marian was a champ!  This brave little girl did not even cry until the 8th time they pricked her.  Yes, it took three nurses not because my daughter was a raging toddler but because they couldn't figure out how to work the machine.  The doctor came back in and said what I already knew.  Marian has diabetes.  I was totally cool up to this point.  Then she said I need to go straight to the hospital so she can be admitted.  That's were I lost it, I started to cry.  I called my husband and told him.  He'd decided to work a bit late so he was still an hour and a half commute home.  Then got the information for which hospital and walked out crying the whole way.  Marian kept asking why I was crying and Sofia just wanted to give me hugs.  It was amazing at the moment to see Marian's compassion because its not always been her strongest trait.  Sofia tends to be the compassionate one.   God has used being in the hospital and having diabetes to grow Marian in compassion.  I'm grateful that this hardship is producing righteousness instead of selfishness. 

That night we were supposed to have our small group Bible study over for dinner.  Mark sent an email to everyone telling them what happened and that we had to cancel dinner.  I am so grateful for this group.  Our friend Julie called and said "how can I help."  "How soon can you come to our house?"  was all I said.  I was supposed to be at the hospital within the hour.  She came over right away and Sofia was thrilled to spend time with her which made leaving easier.  As I drove to the hospital I called a friend, Lauren, who is a nephrology doctor at Johns Hopkins.  I figured she could answer some of my hospital expectation questions.  I have never been in a hospital nor spent much time in them...they give me the hebe gebees (we just watch Madagascar for those who also enjoy this movie).  I have enough sense to know I want the nurse on my side!  So I asked her what to expect when I arrive at the emergency room, what can I expect doctors and nurses to do for us, how not to be a crazy parent, who will I be meeting (doctors, residents, etc.) and how to tell the difference.  She was amazing.  She walked me through what to expect and she told me its okay to ask questions repeatedly until I was satisfied. 

Marian and I arrived at the emergency room to be admitted and get her iv and blood work done.  I kept thinking why am I here there are SICK people everywhere in here!  I just kept praying  for protection  from getting sick and told Marian not to touch ANYTHING.  I had had enough foresight to pack a boatload of activities since I figured I'd be sitting in an emergency room waiting room for a while.  Gratefully we were called back within 5 minutes of getting to the pediatric waiting area, which was kind-of embarrassing since the place was practically standing room only. 

The emergency room nurses were wonderful at talking with Marian as they took blood put in an iv and ran various tests.  Marian was a trooper!  She barely cried and didn't fight when they took blood or put the iv in.  It broke my heart to see the fear in her eyes though.  Mark arrived with our computer and a movie after we'd been in the emergency room about an hour and a half.  We broke our no movies for the kids rule and allowed her to watch Madagascar.  It got us through the next hour and a half until they were ready for us on the peds floor.  It was now around 8:30pm, an hour and a half past Marian's bedtime.  The residents that came to pick her up, asked her to sit on my lap in the wheelchair.  She looked me and said "I want to sit by myself."  At least diabetes hasn't broken this girl's spunk! 

We arrived in our room and began to get settled in.  Around 10pm we met our endocrinologist.  He came in from vacation to give us our first instruction session.  I can't remember a whole lot of what he said other than "just dive in and give her her first injection, you'll sleep better tonight."  He was right although I think my heart was pounding through my chest.  I was relieved to see the needle was so small!  I was expecting a much larger and longer needle.  My only experience giving injections was with horses so I guess my perspective was a bit skewed;)  I still hate giving shots.  Marian has not ever been horrible about her injections, most of the time she has sat and taken them well, but it breaks my heart to have to do something to her 6-10 times daily that causes her pain.  I remind myself that I need to be grateful this helps keep her alive!  100 years ago we'd be in a whole different battle.  After our initial injection and training session Marian finally was able to get something to eat.  I think her hunger was worse than the shot at this point.  Mark went home since only one parent could stay with her and I couldn't stand the though of leaving her at this point.  She was all ready for bed and in come the residents on rounds.  They wanted to hear the whole story again and check her out.  It's about 4 hours after her bedtime and she's pooped (so is her momma).  Finally my girl can fall asleep, unfortunately we had to wake her up 45 minutes later to test her blood sugar.  I finally got to bed at 1am.  A cool moment among all the doctor visits was looking out at the Baltimore night scape and talking about what we saw.  She still remembers that scene and loves going into Baltimore and pointing out things she could see from her hospital window. 

Well that's the end of Day 1.  I'll post about the rest of our hospital stay in the next few days.